Dear Momma (Cue Tupac)

Dear Momma:

 You're that person I call when I get a bad hair cut,  because only you can understand why I'm crying and only you can understand what I'm saying beneath my sobs.  Being upset for me isn't enough, calling the salon wasn't either, deciding that you couldn't do much from 3,000 miles away made you do the next best thing - phone a boyfriend. Telling said boyfriend to "handle the situation," which roughly translates into "kick that hair dresser's a*s!" is your way of saying "no one messes with momma bear's cubs" and for that I  admire and love you. 

When I don't get the job, get into the perfect school, or when life is just  kicking me in the face, you remind me.  You remind me that when one doors closes you look for the window and if there's no window you get out your own saw and make a goddamn window for yourself. You do not give up and you most certainly don't lose faith, not in yourself. You have always told me, "you can have one day to have a pity party, so  make it a good one; cry and get good and angry 'cause that's the only day you have for this...tomorrow is another day."

When I had my first heart break at the tender age of 27, you were angry and cursing  just as I was, you were also crying in heart ache right along side me. You let me cry in outrage and entertain the idea of driving from New York to North Carolina to confront the muther trucker. Then, you wiped away my tears and showed me that I was better and worth more than that and finally after 5 hours on the phone, you talked me out of it (thank god!).

I am stronger, kinder and an overall better woman because I have you as a mother. I  am self assured, strong in my convictions, and career oriented because you told me -as you were working 3 jobs as a single mother- "there is one person that will take care of you your whole life through, no matter what...and that person is you." 

Above all, you have always accepted me for who I am. You may not understand why I've chosen to be a professional student, decided against marriage, or waited this long to have children (if I ever do)...but you have been my biggest cheerleader. You may not have ever known what you were rooting for, but as long as I decided to do it, you were in.

Momma, I love you more than you will ever know. In fact, I love you more than your chili verde enchiladas...and we both know that's a whole hell of a  lot.

      Happy 21st Birthday!!

                                                                       

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